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Los Angeles, California
I am 47 and thriving in Southern California. One day at a time.
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Sunday, December 4, 2011


i love being a cliche. truly.

because you get the opportunity to laugh uproariously at your utterly unoriginal behavior, while bonding with others who have done exactly. the. same. thing.

for no matter how low we have sunk, we can send each other sky high with peals of laughter over our absurdisms. our insanities. our infantile gaga.

friday night narcotics anonymous meeting in the heart of hollywoodcalifornia. not a louboutin, chardonnay or (douchey) ed hardy shirt in sight. but a klean chain-gang, harlem-shuffling in: juicy sweat pants and juicy sweaty pits.

[and we're off to the races...]

saturday unravelled into typical isolator behavior...scan facebook briefly. after barely stomaching the perfect lives visualized, snowball speedily into emotive breakdown. play current favorite song on repeat all afternoon, and sob so hard and deep for that which you must leave behind...

[all that you can't leave behind, right bono?]

when "the doves" knew i'd been "caught by the river" and drained, i went to a meeting.

"saturday night live". lights. hip-hop music. and 200 of the prettiest alcoholics this side of the valley. but the speaker, w, rocked this little red haired girl into calm. he spoke of a psychiatrist, drtiebolt, who was not an addict, but studied alcoholics in the 50's...defiance, grandiosity, omnipotence...qualities that prevent us from surrender...

words that attach to me, that i need to release. where are the words of quiet acceptance, so i can be free?

tonight, i saw my husband. briefly.

and he called me a tenacious woman. he doesn't often refer to me as woman, which was sexy enough...

but tenacious?

pretty f#*k-ing hot...

[i love words...even the word cliche...]

"TENACIOUS" -thesaurus: determined, strong-willed, dogged, unyielding, unswerving, rock-ribbed.

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