i am a drug addict.
i wrote about this a year ago and comments abounded.
but, nothing has changed. contact brings silence...they never ask; when what i crave is support, help. understanding.
i am weak. desperate. and lost.
but is it up to my friends? no. it's up to me.
yes, there are therapists. but the brunt of the work is mine.
and with these headaches; this apathy; i often turn to the one thing that will briefly ease my pain.
no, it's not a long term solution; but for a few days, i forget about my world.
i hate the world i inhabit. am i my father's daughter? perhaps.
and perhaps it's the only way i can connect with him.
he was weak, lost and desperate, too.
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