lucky there's a family guy...

when kevin announced tonight's "family guy" detailed peter's need for a kidney transplant, my proverbial fists emerged. poised and ready.

insurrection of hackles...commence.

not seconds later, a background rerun of "frasier" found roz wining about the lame ass psa's they had to lay down: "i don't feel good ; i need a new kidney"....

cue laughter.

ouch. uncanny.

i will never understand why the desperate need for organs remains untouchable fodder for flaccid sitcom humor.

this is how funny organ donation is. not only have i blocked a man from india who straight up offered me his kidney on my blog, i have also had interest from someone in iran.

yeah, there's slap yer knee, wipe the tears from your eyes, comedy for you.

so i sat, stiffly positioned on the edge of our couch, as the episode began.

peter sucks back his first "red bull" and a spot on, brilliant parody of madonna's "ray of light" video explodes as he falsettos, "and i feeeeeel, like i just got home..."

a wonderfully subversive commentary unfolds on those hypocrites who only eat organic, but bow head to the white stuff. it begins with his wired purchase of a cow for "daily fresh milk!" and ends with his diagnosis of complete renal failure.

cue: stiffening of muscles. pursing of lips. cocking of head.

[wait for it. wait for it...]

so this animated, pseudo-icon lies bedridden, oxygen tubes jammed up his nose, as his doctor explains that it may take "months" before he can get a kidney.

sigh.

cringe worthy, indeed.

don't call me tipper gore. there is no bigger advocate of freedom of speech than myself. i'm the one that has flapped to the world about everything from my overdose to our financial straits. so. yeah. i wear my heart on my sleeve.

[bono's got nothing on me...]

and i have have always loved "family guy" because seth macfarlane takes no prisoners. it's equal opportunity discrimination. this guy gets it.

sitting on the fence gives you nothing but splinters.

the only way to foster change is through discussion. and discussion can only flower through the pollination of ideas. but that can be an icky, sticky mess.

and most folk just don't wanna git dem hands dirty...

but, honestly. "months" before he can get a kidney? surely with all of macfarlane's millions he must employ a research team. one hit on google would reveal it's typically years and years before anyone registered on UNOS (including myself) will likely receive a cadaver.

[one word..."whoops"...]

when the soap box upon which you stand and spew is built upon pick up sticks, it's impossible to sustain verbal diarrhea without collapsing into a big pile of shit. game over.

[and believe me, i am all too familiar with verbal diarrhea...the literal and figurative kind.]

and maybe this is eye-rolling-inducing-babble. it is "just" a cartoon after all...

there's a "formula" for comedy. tragedy plus time....ah, i was never very good at math...but, comedy must lie with truth. strange bedfellows of the necessary kind.

and that's why i still had a laugh.

peter's doctor explains that until he receives a kidney, he must go on dialysis. 2 hours a day, 3 days a week. peter's squirms his protest and asks for the alternative.

cut to: a colt 45 aimed at his head.

ok. now, that's funny.

it's funny, 'cause it's true.