"the zipper"

k. woke up with night terrors tonight and now i have insomnia.

searing me hot like sizzling, shrimp fajitas. breaking my heart like invading, heart sick souls.

now whirring thoughts invade my mind...like "the zipper" ride; spinning, uncontrollable, and nauseous...painful thoughts endure...

["more than this"...]

the other day, k. told me that dr. d is 74. my heart cracked in two. i would be lost in the woods without him; little ms. red riding hood, ah, she WAS a red head, indeed. denial is mine, and it satisfies...

i often hate face book.

the postings burn my soul. like a blazing fire; a love aflame.

my friends' adventures kill me. i love them; but often feel a deep sadness.

envy burns.

i have been in bed with a head cold since returning from winterpeg. a lonely two weeks...how many movies can one gal watch?

[embrace me, you sweet, embraceable you...]

shine, oh, glowing moon...your beauty amazes all...but, can you keep a secret?

i feel, the gap between my healthy and sick body is much like "the grinch who stole christmas" 's heart; it widens every day like a chasm between my old life and this one...like a mouth in a dentist's chair, ironic as i can't open my mouth due to painful sores...

but, there is much to be grateful for. i can see. i have two legs. and i have joyous love... i am beginning to post five notes of gratitude on my blog. beautiful thoughts i pray will fill my heart...

yes, beautiful gifts, indeed.